Anyone who's talked to me for more than 3 seconds knows I'm a star wars geek, and damn proud of it. Star Wars Mega geeks like myself know that palpatine penned a Darkside Compendium, with his thoughts on The Force, ruling a galaxy, and being a genocidal dick. I present to you his lesser known works, just discovered in a hidden chamber of his palace on Coruscant, thought to be written in his frat days...
PALPATINE'S PICK-UP LINES
"I'm gonna ride you like a tauntaun"
"im gonna blow you like the death star"
"I may look like an Ewok, but I'm all Wookiee where it counts"
"Honey, you've been looking for love in Alderaan places!"
This ones for the ladies: "Is that a lightsabre in your pants, cuz I wanna feel your Force!"
"Ive got a podracer in my pants, can you find it?"
"Date, or date not - there is no 'let's just friends be'"
"I'm gonna make you scream like Chewbacca"
"No, that's not a lightsaber in my pocket..."
"They made a new color light saber called flesh...wanna see?"
"Bend over and show me your dark side"
"Just wait til you try MY blue milk"
"I'm gonna warm you up like Mustafar"
"Lets do it Ewok style"
"They don't call me VADER'S FIST for nothing"
Thanks to Kaitlyn D'Agostino, Kevin Crittenden, Joel Doan, and Michael Whyman for their contributions
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